December 31, 2008

Novel Ideas

I’ve been reading some books lately and thought I’d pass along some brief reviews.

PBC missionary Gary Varner has written a novel called The Great Hour Struck.  All three PBC pastors now have a copy of this book and I started reading it yesterday.  If you like adventure and have an interest in WWII this book is for you.

Actually, Gary has written this book as a tool to help people understand issues of absolute truth in our post-modern culture.  Here’s what he said in a recent email…

This effort combines two of my passions—writing stories and finding common ground to communicate God’s ultimate story of redemption. I strongly agree with what Francis Schaefer said: “We don’t need more Christian books, we need more Christian authors.” I chose fiction as my medium because I believe novels can be a key tool in sharing God’s love and His truth with a postmodernist culture.

There are many novels written today with a Christian worldview, I set out to write one that defines key aspects of the Christian worldview to nonbelievers.  The Great Hour Struck addresses the issue of absolute moral truth and the consequences of philosophical theory applied to the real world.

The Great Hour Struck—is set in World War II within the legendary 101st Airborne Division in the days leading up to D-Day and the crucible of the Normandy campaign that followed.  It is very much in the same vein as Saving Private Ryan or HBO’s Band of Brothers, just toss in a love story and a little more (theistic) philosophy contrasted to god-less philosophies.

I also just finished two books by Mick Peterson, former head football coach at PTHS.  I really enjoyed reading them and told him that I can’t wait for his next book to come out.  You can purchase “Once a Coach” and “Homecoming” by contacting Mick at his website.

I’m about half-way through a very interesting book called Home by Pulitzer Prize-Winning author Marilynne Robinson.  The story is captivating as it shows what happens when two grown children come back home to take care of their ailing father.  I originally bought this book to give me some perspective on “home” for our Christmas Outreach Service but am now hooked on an even deeper level as the book describes how one family heals even as it deals with family secrets.

My favorite book of all-time remains the Bible.  I’m currently reading through Jeremiah and have been reminded of how seriously God takes sin and how difficult it can be to be the one who is charged with communicating God’s truth.

What’s your reading diet going to be in ‘09?  Why not resolve to read the entire Bible this year?  Here are some ideas to get you started from PBC member Joe Myzia.

December 30, 2008

God of This City

My daughter Emily had me listen to this song by Chris Tomlin and then suggested I find it on YouTube.  I love the hope that this brings to those who are downhearted.  In light of the situation with the Pontiac Correctional Center, layoffs, and the sagging economy, I’m thankful for the reminder that God has greater things that He still wants to do.

December 30, 2008

Praying for the Church

Chuck Colson has been praying for the church and has written some provocative words…

I want to put it in the plainest terms I know how: This nation cannot be saved unless the Church is first revived. Renewing the Church is the key to saving America.

Be sure to read the entire article and then would you stop right now and pray for PBC and for all churches?

December 30, 2008

A Psalm for the New Year

As we get ready for a new year, let’s determine to get off to a good start.  This sermon from last year may be of help to you.

December 29, 2008

Facebook Friend?

If you’re on Facebook and want to be a friend, just click below.

December 29, 2008

How to Be a Wise Guy (or Gal)

Most of us think of a resolution as a decision to stop doing something that’s bad for us or as a promise to do something that’s good for us.  We wish each other a “Happy New Year,” (whatever that means) and we want the same for ourselves.  And yet, if the truth were known, many of us are the same this year as we were last year, and we’re not really sure that we even can change. 

Instead of encouraging you to make some new resolutions, as helpful as they can be, I want to challenge you to make just one request that will not only alter your year, but has the potential to change your life. 

If you could ask for just one thing in 2009, what would it be?  Fame?  Power?  Money?  Good health?  Long life?  One night God appeared to Solomon in 1 Kings 3:5 and said, “Ask for whatever you want me to give you.”  Solomon’s answer was startling in its simplicity.  He merely requested a discerning heart and the supernatural ability to distinguish between right and wrong.  God was pleased with this kind of request and said in verse 12: “I will do what you have asked.  I will give you a wise and discerning heart…”

Many of Solomon’s words of wisdom ended up in what we know as the Old Testament Book of Proverbs.  A proverb has been called a “short sentence founded upon long experience.”  That’s probably what was behind one of my favorite ones: “Like one who seizes a dog by the ears is a passer-by who meddles in a quarrel not his own” (26:17).  That’s wisdom from experience!

Proverbs 1:7 is both the theme of the book and the key that unlocks the way to wisdom: “The fear of the LORD is the beginning of knowledge, but fools despise wisdom and discipline.”  In this verse we see that there are two classes of people: those who fear the Lord, and the fools who do not.  The first lesson we must learn in the school of wisdom is to develop a proper view of God.

A fool is not just someone who is a couple bricks short of a load, or one whose elevator does not go to the top floor.  In Proverbs, the fool is the one who doesn’t follow God’s ways.  He’s the one who knows the right thing to do but instead does the opposite, or simply does nothing.  Proverbs 1:32 says that the “complacency of fools will destroy them.” 

Here’s a challenge in the New Year.  Simply read one chapter in the Book of Proverbs every day.  Since there are 31 chapters you could read the chapter that corresponds with the day of the month.  When you read, write down one verse from the chapter and meditate on it throughout the day.  Awhile ago, as I forced myself out of bed one morning, I jotted Proverbs 6:9 down: “How long will you lie there, you sluggard?  When will you get up from your sleep?”

If you truly want a Happy New Year, then make it a Holy New Year and request the wisdom of God.  Proverbs 3:13 says, “Happy is the man who finds wisdom and the man who gets understanding.”  While many resolutions become dissolutions, researchers have discovered that most people will keep the pledge they put at the top of their list.  Will you make wisdom your goal this year?  If you do, this year will be different than last year…and your life will never be the same.

December 28, 2008

Not Yet

Ray Pritchard has posted a new sermon that is filled with hope.  Check it out here.

Here’s part of what he said…

The little word “yet” makes all the difference between hope and despair. There is a world of difference between these two statements:

“He is not saved.”
“He is not saved yet.”

The first is a statement of fact; the second is a statement of faith. Words matter. If we truly believe God can intervene to change history, then we ought to use the word “yet” even when describing things that seem hopeless today.

“He is not saved yet.”
“The situation is not any better (yet!).”
“I don’t have a job yet.”
“My son has not come back to the Lord yet.”

Hang on to that little word “yet.” It’s a great word as we come to the beginning of a new year.

December 26, 2008

Ho Ho Humdrum

Now that Christmas has crescendoed, some of us are back to our complicated and chaotic lives. Others of us have moved from “ho, ho, ho” to humdrum. Has your “fa-la-la-la-la” turned to blah-blah-blah?

We don’t spend much time on this but I think Joseph and Mary had a letdown as well. They were joyfully greeted by the shepherds and then some time later a bunch of wise guys from out east came and worshipped the Christ child, bringing expensive gifts with them but then things head south, literally. While Luke’s account has no songs of sadness, Matthew’s narrative is drenched in tears and fears, pain and problems, blood and lament. The picture is not pretty and is usually kept off the cover our Christmas cards and out of our Christmas carols.

Read more here…

December 25, 2008

Christmas Eve Message

Pastor Jeff led our Christmas Eve service last night and did a great job.  Check out his message here.

December 24, 2008

Facebook Fan

I’ve just entered the world of Facebook.  Now I have to see if I have any “friends” out there…

i’m having a hard time writing in lower case and forgetting bout punctuation and spieling. 

i also need to lern the abbrevs. like lol, pos, etc

if u hav aniy sujestyons, jest lit mee no…k?

December 23, 2008

Waiting for Christmas

As Christmas gets closer, we can learn much from two individuals who were waiting for Christmas.

December 21, 2008

Drifter by Dan

Dan Ucherek sang this song to conclude our services today.  It was a “wow” moment, especially in the second service.

December 20, 2008

Peace on Earth

I really enjoyed watching this video by Casting Crowns this morning.

December 19, 2008

Forgotten Family Tree

The opening verses of Matthew’s gospel are often ignored in the Christmas story.  Check out this sermon that may help you see these verses differently.

December 18, 2008

Bloggin’ Blahs

If you’re a regular reader of this blog, you’ve no doubt noticed that my posts have been spotty recently.  I can’t really explain it other than to say that I’ve got the “bloggin’ blahs.”

There, I feel better just saying that.  Now we’ll see if I can get back on track.

December 17, 2008

Home for Christmas?

Utilizing live drama, a kids Christmas choir, contemporary Christmas music and a relevant message, we will be presenting “Home For Christmas” on Sunday, December 21st at both 9:00 a.m. and 10:45 a.m.  Come and learn how the desire to be home for Christmas is actually a deep longing to find our true home.  Childcare will be available from nursery through four-years-old.

A family in our church is providing a free meal immediately following the second service.  Please spread the word to people in the community.  I love watching how people respond to the needs around us—45 Christmas baskets will be delivered this week, along with all the Project Angel Tree gifts.

We will also be having a creative Christmas Eve service at 6:00 p.m. on December 24th.  Families are encouraged to come and participate together.

December 15, 2008

Christmas Conflict

One of the points I made in the message on Sunday was that Christmas brings conflict because just as Satan tried to wipe out the first Christmas through the hatred of Herod, so too he goes after Christmas and Christians today.

I think he was trying to disrupt things during the services.  Here’s a summary of what happened.

In the first service, we were not able to play the opening video that dealt with the theme of worship because the computer froze.  We weren’t able to put words up on the screen for the first couple songs either.

In the second service, one of our daughters got sick so I had to leave and take her to my office.  When it came time for the preaching I couldn’t get my laptop to advance the PowerPoint slides.  I carry a remote in my pocket and kept pushing the button but nothing happened.  It was then that John Grampp came to the rescue by going up on the stage to advance the slides for me.  It wasn’t until after the service that I realized I had somehow turned the remote off!  Nevertheless, it was good to see John on his knees for this long!  Seriously, I really appreciate his servant attitude.

Wait…there’s more.  While I was preaching I noticed that Rich Yaeger, who was sitting about half-way back on my left, sprang out of his chair and ran up to the platform.  I chose to not look because I didn’t want to draw everyone’s attention to what he was doing.  It wouldn’t have mattered because all eyes were on Rich who was putting out a lit candle that had tipped over on the advent wreath.  I didn’t realize what had happened until after the service when a fireman told me he saw what had happened but he was waiting until the church caught on fire before he was going to lend his assistance.

I’m thankful that God’s Word was preached and that God’s people worshiped the King of Kings yesterday.  Satan will continue to bring chaos and conflict to each of us this Christmas but let’s remember that he’s a defeated foe!

I love this promise from Paul in Romans 16:20 - “The God of peace will soon crush Satan under your feet.”

And may these words from Ephesians 6:13 be put into practice by each of us as we navigate through the coming days leading up to Christmas: “Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand.”

December 15, 2008

Why Preach Romans?

Moody Bible Institute’s Alumni Website has posted the article called Why Preach Romans?

December 13, 2008

Christmas Linebacker

I hope you don’t meet this linebacker this Christmas. 

December 13, 2008

Whoever Takes the Son

Many years ago, there was a very wealthy man who shared a passion for art collecting with his son. They had priceless works by Picasso and Van Gogh adorning the walls of their family estate.

As winter approached, war engulfed the nation, and the young man left to serve his country. After only a few short weeks, his father received a telegram. His son had died.

Distraught and lonely, the old man faced the upcoming Christmas holidays with anguish and sadness. The joy of the season had vanished with the death of his son.

On Christmas morning, a knock on the door awakened the depressed old man. As he walked to the door, the masterpieces of art on the walls only reminded him that his son was not coming home. As he opened the door he was greeted by a soldier with a large package in his hands who said, “I was a friend of your son. I was was the one he was rescuing when he died. May I come in for a few moments? I have something to show you.”

The soldier mentioned that he was an artist and then gave the old man the package. The paper gave way to reveal a portrait of the man’s son. Though the world would never consider it the work of a genius, the painting featured the young man’s face in striking detail. Overcome with emotion, the man hung the portrait over the fireplace, pushing aside millions of dollars worth of art. His task completed, the old man sat in his chair and spent Christmas gazing at the gift he had been given.

The painting of his son soon became his most prized possession, far eclipsing any interest in the pieces of art for which museums around the world clamored.

The following spring, the old man died. The art world waited with anticipation for the upcoming auction. According to the will of the old man, all the art works would be auctioned on Christmas Day, the day he had received the greatest gift.

The day soon arrived and art collectors from around the world gathered to bid on some of the world’s most spectacular paintings. Dreams would be fulfilled that day.

The auction began with a painting that was not on anyone’s museum list. It was the painting of the man’s son. The auctioneer asked for an opening bid, but the room was silent. “Who will open the bidding with $100?” No one spoke. Finally someone said, “Who cares about that painting. It’s just a picture of his son. Let’s move on to the good stuff.”

The auctioneer responded, “No, we have to sell this one first. Now, who will take the son?” Finally, a neighbor of the old man offered $10 dollars. “That’s all I have. I knew the boy, so I’d like to have it.”

The auctioneer said, “Going once, going twice…gone.” The gavel fell.

Cheers filled the room and someone exclaimed, “Now we can bid on the real treasures!”

The auctioneer looked at the room filled with people and announced that the auction was over. Everyone was stunned. Someone spoke up and said, “What do you mean, it’s over? We didn’t come here for a painting of someone’s son. There are millions of dollars worth of art here! What’s going on?”

The auctioneer replied, “It’s very simple. According to the will of the Father, whoever takes the son…gets it all.”

Puts things in perspective, doesn’t it? The message is the same this Christmas. Because of the Father’s love…whoever takes the Son gets it all.

Will you take Him this Christmas?

You’re invited to a birthday party. It’s the birthday of Jesus. It’s His party – but He wants to give you a present. He wants to give you the gift of Himself. Will you take Him?

December 12, 2008

Advent Conspiracy

This video is jarring in its simple, yet deep message.  You probably want to watch it before you go shopping,not after.

Just a reminder that this Sunday is the day to bring your wrapped presents for Project Angel Tree.

December 09, 2008

Missed Christmases

I’m so glad that Pastor Dick had the idea three years ago for PBC to host a complimentary breakfast for our local and county officials and school administrators.  After the Madrigal Recorders and the Madrigal singers performed beautifully, Dean Ridder, principal of Pontiac Christian School, gave the devotional.  It was so good that I’ve asked him for permission to post it here.

Good Morning. I bring you the greetings of the students and staff of Pontiac Christian School.

My family and I moved to Livingston County three years ago. This means that no one in my family has a Livingston County birth certificate. Because we don’t have Livingston County Birth Certificates, that means that we are “From Away.” Because we are “From Away,” we recognize some of the habits of the folks in Livingston County. One of these habits is a way that people have of calling things by what they used to be known as, without clarification.

My wife and I have been told many times to get a MaxCard so that we can save money at Niemann’s. I don’t know where that is. There is a good Convenience Mart at Wiley’s on Mill Street. I have been up and down Mill Street countless times, but I don’t know where that is. There is full-service gas at Ramseyer’s. I don’t know where that is. I have missed a few lunch appointments because of this phenomenon. I was supposed to meet somebody at Buster’s. I don’t know where that is. I was supposed to meet somebody else at the NEW Log Cabin. This time I decided to ask somebody before setting out to find the restaurant. I was told—Oh, it isn’t called the New Log Cabin anymore. It is called Blue Skies. But I don’t know where that is.

This is why I like a guy like Dale Shrock. He named his business Dairy Queen. It has always been known as Dairy Queen. Everybody in town calls it Dairy Queen. And the sign on the building says “DQ.” Now that I can understand.

I have fond memories of Christmas growing up as a child. One memory of Christmas that stands out in my mind is the annual Sunday School Christmas program at the church that my family worshipped at.

Each year, the Sunday School Christmas Program was a big event. I always wanted to be part of the Christmas Program. I think I wanted to be part of the Program for two reasons: (1) It was a big event, and (2) they gave the participants in the program a box of Fannie May chocolates at the end of the program.

When I was in 4th Grade, I auditioned for the Christmas Program. That year the Program was called, “The Littlest Bell that Wouldn’t Stop Ringing.” The characters were bells that told the story of Christmas. I got the part of Grumpy Bell. I had to wear a black, papier mache bell costume with a handle coming out of my head. I had to say…

My name is Grumpy Bell.  I’m sure that you can tell. 
I’m known all over town I always wear a frown. 
Yes, my name is Grumpy…Bell

The program went well. They gave me a box of Fannie May chocolates. They tasted very good.

In fifth grade, I auditioned for the Christmas Program again. That year the program was about a group of toys that told the story of Christmas. I got the part of a robot. I had to speak in a monotone voice and only gave factual information. My father made me a costume out of large boxes that completely covered my head and torso. He put flashing lights on it, and antennae coming out of the head. Underneath the boxes, I wore a “sauna suit” to cover my arms and legs. A sauna suit is a metallic suit designed to make you sweat. So, with the combination of the heat of the spotlights, the heat of the flashing lights in the costume, and the sauna suit keeping all of that heat close to me, I began to feel like I was going to pass out. I knew enough to get off the stage as quickly as I could, which wasn’t very fast in a robot costume. As soon as I got off the stage, I passed out. Fortunately, the show went on, and a paramedic happened to be nearby in the audience. That year, they gave me two boxes of Fannie May chocolates, and they tasted really good.

When I was in 6th grade, they decided to not do a large production. I don’t know why! They decided a more simple affair (without children in costumes) was in order. The committee that put on the program asked the children in Sunday School to write an essay about what the true meaning of Christmas was. They would pick their favorite essay, and the child that wrote the essay would get to read the essay in the program. My friends all began to write essays about how Christmas meant that they were going to get a ColecoVision. (A ColecoVision is a game console that came after Atari, but was way before Xbox 360 and Wii.) I knew that writing an essay saying that the meaning of Christmas was about ColecoVision or GETTING any kind of present wasn’t going to be picked for the Program. I wrote an essay about how Christmas meant that God sent his son Jesus, and because of the gift of Jesus, we can now GIVE to each other. Of course, the committee liked my essay best, and I was chosen to read my essay in the Christmas Program.

As I was in the middle of reading my essay in the Christmas Program, I felt like a fraud. I knew that I didn’t really mean what I was saying. To me, Christmas was all about getting a ColecoVision. I knew that I was being insincere, and didn’t mean what I was saying. At the end of the program, they gave me a box of Fanny May chocolates, but that year, they didn’t taste good at all.

You see, even though I was standing in church, at a Christmas program, reading an essay about the meaning of Christmas, I almost missed Christmas that year. But missing Christmas is nothing new. It happens all the time. We get so wrapped up in the celebration and busyness of Christmas that we actually miss Christ. In fact, people have been missing Christmas since the very first Christmas.

Luke 2 tells us why Mary and Joseph, and a lot of other people, were even in Bethlehem the day that Jesus was born. Starting at verse 1: “In those days Caesar Augustus issued a decree that a census should be taken of the entire Roman world…and everyone went to his own town to register. So Joseph also went up from the town of Nazareth in Galilee to Judea, to Bethlehem, the town of David, because he belonged to the house and line of David. He went there to register with Mary, who was pledged to be married to him and was expecting a child.”

Bethlehem was busy when Jesus was born. There were a lot of people in the city, but there is no record that anyone even noticed the event. The people of Bethlehem missed Christmas. They were busy living their lives. They were preoccupied, but they missed Christmas.
In Luke 2:7, the Bible says, “...and she gave birth to a her firstborn, a son. She wrapped him in cloths and placed him in a manger, because there was no room for them in the inn.”

Another person that missed Christmas was the innkeeper. Notice the Bible didn’t mention the innkeeper, or give him any particular quote. However, there was an inn, so there must have been an innkeeper. He missed Christmas. He had to look a pregnant woman in the eye and tell her that he didn’t have any place for her to stay. He seems to be indifferent, and doesn’t seem to have called for any help. Where is the midwife? Where are the people who are supposed to take care of these things. They are not there. The innkeeper missed that first Christmas. He was busy taking care of business. We can’t blame him, really. He didn’t know. But he missed Christmas.

In Matthew 2, we find another person who missed Christmas. This man really missed it. He can’t claim that he didn’t know, like the innkeeper could. He was very informed: “After Jesus was born in Bethlehem in Judea, during the time of King Herod, Magi from the east came to Jerusalem and asked, “Where is the one who has been born king of the Jews? We saw his star in the east and have come to worship him. When King Herod heard this he was disturbed, and all Jerusalem with him.”
And in vs. 7: “Then Herod called the Magi secretly and found out from them the exact time the star had appeared. He sent them to Bethlehem and said, “Go and make a careful search for the child. As soon as you find him, report to me, so that i too may go and worship him.”

Of course, Herod was only PRETENDING to want to worship Christ. Herod was more interested that someone was born King of the Jews. This was a threat to him. Herod was the king of that part of the Roman empire. He was concerned about his own self-interests. He was afraid. And he missed Christmas.

There is another group of people that missed the first Christmas. This also comes from Matthew. As Herod hears from the wise men that a star led them to Israel because a king was born, what does he do? In verse 4, its says, “When he had called together all the people’s chief priests and teaches of the law, he asked them where the Christ was to be born. ‘In Bethlehem in Judea,’ they replied.”

They went on to quote a reference from the Old Testament book of Micah (Chapter 5:2).
“But you, Bethlehem Ephrathah, though you are small among the clans of Judah, out of you will come for me; one who will be ruler over Israel.”

These men were the religious scholars of the day. They were the informed people. These people should have known better. And when asked where the King of the Jews was to be born, they knew the answer. They had been waiting their whole lives for a deliverer—a king that would rescue them from the Romans. They studied the Scriptures and knew the promises of a Messiah—someone that would rescue them.  And they hear that a star has announced that a king has been born to the Jews. But they didn’t get up and go themselves. I have always wondered about that. Why didn’t they go to see the this newborn king? These people missed Christmas. They were indifferent. They didn’t care, and they missed Christmas.

We miss Christmas now for the same reasons. We miss Christmas because we are preoccupied. We miss Christmas because we are too busy taking care of business. We miss Christmas because we are concerned about our own personal situations, or because we are afraid. We miss Christmas because we are indifferent. We have heard the Christmas story so many times, and familiarity breeds contempt.

There is a lot of wonder in the birth of Christ. There is a lot of awe to marvel at. But we loose the wonder and the awe because we become indifferent. It is a wonder that the God of the universe and the maker of our hearts came to be born as a baby. It is a wonder that God sent His only Son. His birth was foretold by prophets, and perfectly fulfilled. Think of the wonder of that!  His birth was announced by angels and a guiding star.  There is awe in that. And then there is the wonder and awe of who Jesus is, and what He has done for us. I John 5:11-12 says, “And this is the testimony: God has given us eternal life, and this life is in His Son.  He who has the Son has life; he who does not have the Son of God does not have life.”

So this Christmas, let’s not miss the wonder and the awe of the Savior born in a manger in the town of Bethlehem. We can do better than going through the motions of another season of celebration, putting on happy faces, all the while eating Fanny May chocolates.

Let’s not miss another Christmas.

December 08, 2008

WORLD Wide Web

We received a cool email today from a pastor in Japan who reads the sermons on our website.

Just wanted to say that your sermons are a great resource to me as I prepare my sermons here in Hiroshima, Japan.

God Bless,
Kris Habacon

December 06, 2008

Our Words

I came across something today that serves as a helpful corrective when we’re tempted to say something we shouldn’t.  Using the word HALT, we need to be careful in our conversations when we’re…

Hungry
Angry
Lonely
Tired

Proverbs 12:18: “Reckless words pierce like a sword, but the tongue of the wise brings healing.”

Proverbs 29:22: “An angry man stirs up dissension, and a hot-tempered man commits many sins.”

Proverbs 29:20: “Do you see a man who speaks in haste? There is more hope for a fool than for him.”

Proverbs 21:23 challenges us to be careful about our conversations: “He who guards his mouth and tongue keeps himself from calamity.”

Proverbs 15:28, in the NASB, challenges us to think before we answer: “The heart of the righteous ponders how to answer, but the mouth of the wicked pours out evil things.”

December 05, 2008

Is He in You?

My friend Craig Wininger passed this along this morning.  What’s in your heart?  Is He in you?

December 05, 2008

Help!  My Doubts Scare Me!

On Sunday we’ll be looking at the topic of “Doubt.”  In my studying this week I came across a Q & A between an 18-year-old and one of the staff members from Probe Ministries.

Her questions are sincere and the staff member’s answers are quite helpful.  Check it out.

December 04, 2008

Joseph’s Perspective

As we continue to focus on the events and individuals of Christmas, don’t forget Joseph.

December 03, 2008

My Chains Are Gone

This amazing rendition of Amazing Grace by Chris Tomlin gives a lot of hope to families that are grieving.  We’re going to show this at the end of Scott Rutledge’s funeral today.  Marvin told me that his family has watched this at least ten times in the past couple days.

December 01, 2008

Helping the Hurting

Have you ever struggled with how best to help someone after they receive terrible health news or someone close to them dies?  I’ve shared this before but wanted to pass it along again because there are plenty of hurting people around us today.

My first friend came and expressed shock by saying, “I can’t believe you’re sick.  I always thought you were so active and healthy.”  He left and I felt alienated and somehow very different.

My second friend came and brought me information about different treatments and gave me his opinion about what to do.  He left and I felt scared and confused.

My third friend came and tried to answer my “whys?” and told me God may be disciplining me for some sin in my life.  She left and I felt guilty.

My fourth friend came and told me that that if my faith was greater God would heal me.  He left and I felt like my faith must be inadequate.

My fifth friend came and told me to remember that all things work together for good.  She left and I felt angry.

My sixth friend never came at all.  I felt sad and alone.

My seventh friend came and held my hand and said, “I care.  I’m here.  I want to help you through this.”  She left, I felt loved, and I knew everything was going to be OK.

(adapted from Linda Mae Richardson).

After reading this, I was reminded of a sermon I preached earlier this year about how Job’s friends were of great help to him (at least at the beginning).

Let’s take a look at some lessons we can learn to help us help others when they’re going through tough times.  These lessons come from the first chapter of Job.

Hear the hurting. Eliphaz, Bildad and Zophar “heard about all the troubles that had come upon him.” The first step for us is to actually listen when someone is speaking so that we pick up on their problems. When you hear that another person is in pain, write it down so you can follow-up.

Sacrifice your schedule. The next thing they do is “to set out from their homes.” If we’re going to care for the hurting, we’re going to have to sacrifice our schedule. If we wait to care until it’s convenient, it will never happen.

Partner with people. Catch what happens next – they “met together by agreement.” It’s always a good idea to take someone with you when you hear of a need.

Go with grace. Their goal was to go “and sympathize with him.” This is the word “nud” in Hebrew, which means to rock back and forth. When people go through tremendous pain they often rock themselves back and forth – we’re to join them in that.

Come with comfort. This is a similar idea and carries with it the idea of coming alongside.

Expect a change in appearance. When people grieve they often look different, sickness may cause other changes, and they may say shocking things as well. Look at verse 12: “When they saw him from a distance, they could hardly recognize him…”

Exhibit your emotions. When they saw Job in his distress they started to cry: “they began to weep aloud.” Don’t be afraid to express your emotions. Romans 12:15 says, “Mourn with those who mourn.” One author writes: “We can forget those with whom we have laughed, but we can never forget those with whom we’ve cried.”

Respond with rituals. After weeping aloud, they “tore their robes.” That was a cultural way of demonstrating that they were all tore up on the inside as Joel 2:13 says: “Rend your heart and not your garments.” I’m not quite sure what that looks like today but it probably involves doing something tangible like cleaning the house, bringing a meal, etc. If you’d like to serve on a team that brings meals, please contact the church office.

Honor with humility. In that culture pouring dust on the head was a sign of humility: “and sprinkled dust on their heads.” This carries with it the idea of looking for ways to enter into someone’s pain.

Sit with the sufferer. Look at the first part of verse 13: “Then they sat on the ground with him…” It’s important to get on the person’s level and get as close as possible. I know of a chaplain who has actually lain down next to a person who was dying because the individual was cold. That’s amazing to me.

Take the time needed. These three friends were in no hurry to leave. Amazingly, they were there for “seven days and seven nights.” This is called “sitting sheva,” which means “sitting sevens” and has become part of Jewish life. We see this in Genesis 50:10 when “Joseph observed a seven-day period of mourning for his father.” While we shouldn’t overstay our welcome, it’s important to spend time with people when they’re in pain.

Be silent in the face of suffering. Sometimes silence is the best response we can have. Look at the last part of verse 13: “No one said a word to him, because they saw how great his suffering was.” I’ll never forget a hospital visit from a deacon in our church in Rockford after Becca was born. She had stopped breathing several times and I was afraid. As I was pacing around the waiting room, Jay Forsyth showed up and gave me a big hug. He then sat next to me and didn’t say a word. It meant the world to me.

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